When a piece of paper is folded, it results in a crease being left behind. This crease remains as a sign of the trauma it once received. Sometimes, people can have creases.
Most days I struggle to get out of bed. I live with depression. A medical condition that is rapidly on the rise. For some, the condition will come and go in their lifetime. For some of us, it’s a chronic condition that offers little to no respite. I’m often told that it is ok to not be ok. I disagree. It’s not ok to not be ok.
For me, my depression is much more than feeling lethargic, sad or lonely. It’s the daily battle with my voice of hate. But where can I turn to when I have no friends or family left, and that battle starts to become a little too difficult?
This is not a nice story. This is not a story about happily ever after. This is a story that unapologetically doesn’t hold back. This, is my story.
Source | Format | Pages | Publisher | Genre | Publication Date |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
Smashwords | ebook | 54 | indie | Fiction (Mental Health) | June 15th, 2018 |
Creases is a short story at 54 pages, but for its small size, it has all the emotional impact it intends to deliver as it opens a window and gives you an honest, heartbreaking glimpse into one day with depression! One! A day that starts with depression and a day that ends with depression. A day that has apathy, anxiety, worry and tears, a cry for help, an internal battle, exhaustion. I imagine someone, or myself, living this very kind of day 5475+ times – day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year- and it leaves me speechless, dumbfounded and wanting to do something about it so that no one ever has to feel this way…
Creases is not one of those stories that end on a high note, after which we all live happily ever after. Instead, it’s an unapologetic account of depression’s most evil grip. An unapologetic view of a mental health service failing someone point-blank asking for help and support. An unapologetic invite into the thoughts of a person teetering in between wanting to get better and wanting to end it all. It’s about witnessing how one moment after another fills up one side of the scales of life and death more than the other. In this story, the scales tip towards not existing. Because it happens, every day! Creases is straight up and it does not shy away or gloss over the real and most hopeless, darkest feelings and thoughts which guide a soul into the abyss of nothingness.
Creases explores the mantra of ‘It’s ok to not be ok’ which as of late has become the force to break the stigma around depression and mental health illnesses. In Creases, a question is asked- is it really ok to not be ok? Because, no matter how easily we want to find a solution to any of our problems, personal or global, it truly is not that straight forward as repeating ‘It’s ok’ over an over. To accept that we’re not ok, to live with this decision to not be okay whilst battling the healthcare system for meaningful help and support.
‘It’s ok’- in Creases, these two tiny words are a bandaid over a deep, gaping wound of a mind full of turmoil and truth. Truth about the real state of mind as it plots to give in to death in a million possible ways. We are humans with hidden depths and layers, and sometimes those layers have creases… Creases that are not okay. Creases that hurt and inject doubt. Creases that keep reminding us of those difficult times, pulling us back under…
Creases shows you what it’s like to wake up with depression and manage the morning routine, what it’s like to go to and be at work with depression, what it’s like to ask for help and what it’s like to give up… That ending was loud and clear- too many times those two words- It’s ok- were used to get from one moment to the next. As if a burden… as if an excess to society- ‘It’s ok’ turned into: ‘It’s ok, I know I’m not ok, so I am going to remove myself from the picture. Truly, it’s ok.’
It’s not ok.
You can find ‘Creases‘ on Smashwords for free in and in your preferred format.
Creases on Goodreads ¦ Smashwords
About the author:
When he isn’t furiously rewriting drafts of his manuscripts, or plotting out stories that he never finishes, he can be found with his head in a good book, or getting lost in a vidya game.
He also likes melons and donuts.
Wow fantastic review!
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Thank you!
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Terrific review. I have seen close friends and my own father battle depression every day, and it is very hard. Both for the ones that have the depression, but also for the ones that want to support those loved ones.
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Thank you!
It is true what you say- it is difficult to experience and difficult to witness…
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I am definitely adding it to my TBR. Depression is something that is [sadly] very close to me.
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Sorry to hear that 😦 Depression is such a monster and I hope that whoever is struggling will continue to manage to beat it! Best!
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Aww, lovely review! I like that you bring up the point about how it’s okay not to be okay. People do tend to muffle their pain by pretending their pain isn’t real, but it’s in fact the first thing you have to acknowledge to even begin treating/healing from it. This book sounds very deep, and I’m glad it seems to be addressing the right things. 🙂 Again, excellent review!
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Thank you so much- and I appreciate your thoughts, as well- very well put! It really has become such an automatic thing to say- I’m OK when we’re not… and the ‘it’s ok to not be ok’ only enables this automatic response even more. It’s kind of like- everyone now says it’s ok to not be ok, so let’s not address it at all because it’s ok… a bit of a vicious circle… hmm…
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Wow, awesome review, Liz. It must be quite something if it had you imagining that day in the book expanded over a whole lifetime. Really does make you realize how awful some people have it. Also nice to see that this is a short story from a fellow blogger! Was it upon request or did you want to try out out of the blue what he had created?
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