And the thousand rabid dogs will tear at your insides. It’s pain unlike any other pain you’ve felt in your life. Anguish, agony… Hunger, bloodshot eyes and vicious intention- Hell will attack you with brute strength.
You’re trapped and knowing that you’re trapped only fuels the panic, sharpens the pain. You want to fight it, but your limbs won’t move, your brain doesn’t work. As I said- trapped! With no end in sight.
If only there was one version of Hell which we could all bypass and never have to endure. Oh, no, Hell comes in many forms. With many feelings, and never the good ones. Hell comes with weight, stamina and gale force winds. It will twist your arms behind your back to the very point of relocating joints. It will kick you so you would fall on your knees in front of it. Hell will look down on you with a wicked grin and demands your fear.
A version of Hell where you know what is yet to come is the worst version. You can kick and scream, but there will be no escape. In the end, the Hell that strikes you will leave you dangling on a rope out the window. It will lift your hand to grip anything sharp enough to slash away at yourself.
But Hell is clever in other ways. It doesn’t only torture you but will also work its way around the one who finds you after you’ve given up. It’s fuel for Hell. The gas, the petrol, the firestarter.
What we often don’t realize is that Hell is a bully! And if you want to come out of this fight alive you must never give up! So gather the last drops of what makes you human, gather the scattered remains of pride, gather the weakest strands of your strength and raise your head! With your head held high, it’s almost as if you open up the veins in your neck and let new power course through your beaten-up-self. Raise your head and ram through that invisible line, that choice which was put in front of you. With every further step towards suffocating Hell, you will become more self-aware of the power you have, even though hidden, of the goals you will accomplish, and of the person you really are.
Never give up... Embrace yourself to be the true force behind life. Take control and feed your ego. It is entirely alright to do so at times! 🙂
Inspired by Jack Sutter’s “Suicide is Just an Exit Strategy” and a documentary set place in Mentor, Ohio