30109213Paige Dawson: the mother of a murdered child and wife to a dead man.

She has nothing left to live for… until she finds her husband’s handgun hidden in their house.

Why did Ryan need a gun? What did he know about their daughter’s death?

Desperate for the truth, Paige begins to unearth her husband’s secrets.

But she has no idea who she is up against, or that her life isn’t hers to gamble – she belongs to me.

Source Edition Pages
Amazon ebook 226

I am so glad I don’t limit myself to single genres when it comes to reading. I am so glad I follow book bloggers who read titles that I normally wouldn’t consider picking up. I still read the reviews though, even if to ‘educate’ myself in wordmanship and learn about different ways on how to approach writing a review. My Girl was recommended to me by Inge, The Belgian Reviewer [Inge’s review of My Girl], after I very much enjoyed The One by John Marrs she had heartily recommended on her blog, and … I just have a question for myself…

Why have I, more often than not, looked past thrillers? I mean, I’ve read a few and they’ve been really good so how come I simply haven’t read more? 

Anyway, I think the error is now fixed… Note to self: Yes, I don’t like cosy mysteries, but thrillers are not cosy mysteries. Stop being dosey! Thrillers don’t bore me to death with village life and cupcake killers. Thrillers deliver, girl. Read more thrillers!

A quick, non-spoilery overview, everyone? Follow me… 

Paige Dawson, mother of a murdered child, wife of a dead husband is totally off the rails with grief. She fills her days with pills, booze and self pity. She’s especially good at giving herself more reasons for self pity by doing some pretty stupid things. Stupid is the wrong word… more like degrading! But how do you judge a person who has lost their child and seen her husband’s lifeless eyes? Without her daughter and husband, Paige doesn’t care that her carpet is covered in puke. She doesn’t care that her health is giving her bloodred warning signs…

Taking care of 40+y/o Paige, even though she just wants to be left alone in her messy stinking house, are her father, brother and her in-laws. She promises left-right-and-centre that she will be a new woman ‘tomorrow morning after a sleep‘. Except she doesn’t, in fact, keep any of those promises. Instead she goes and gets slapped by ASBO by the police after DUI and then ends up finds a gun in her husband’s belongings. The discovery of a gun of course opens up a new box of worms… what was her husband up to? As if this isn’t enough for her constantly drunken mind, other strange events start to happen. Smaller ones at first she dismisses, then bigger and more impactful changes she just can’t undo. But talking to a PI is pointless. After all, who would take seriously claims by a woman who is self destructing due to grief? Besides, going by the facts, it’s probably Paige herself, doing things and then forgetting about them- I’m super vague aren’t I? 😀

When all goes up in flames, Paige finds herself in fresh hell she could never have imagined.

My thoughts… 

This book definitely took me by surprise. Delivered in 3 parts, no stone will be left unturned. Part 1 gets us all up and close comfy with Paige’s character and her status quo and ends with the reveal of the story’s Twisted Fuck (see below). Part 2 is an important filler to the story handling some past events up until present! And Part 3… well, it’s a  part full of conclusions, more revelations and an ending fit to the story.

My Girl delivers dark and creepy from start to finish. Paige’s character is one dealing with tons of suffering and even though at times I wanted to just shake her and tell her to snap out of it, it’s not really how things work. I could say, she is a character that managed to make feel feel equally as much compassion for her as well as disgust at times. In the end though, when all was said and done… and explained… I have nothing but sympathy!

If there ever is a rock bottom that an author can write a character into, My Girl gives an example of the rockiest of rock bottoms. If there ever is a book that can mix together so much yuk and ‘oh come come, really?’, it’s My Girl. If you’re a squeamish reader and can’t stand violence- yeah, I’d pass on this one.

As for our Twisted Fuck of the story… well… Just before ‘the big revelation’ I figured it out. I had this creepy-crawly feeling of who’s behind it all…  It was actually a small comment made by them that rubbed me the wrong way. Having said that… figuring out the culprit doesn’t always mean the story has nowhere else to progress and in the case of My Girl, when I thought it couldn’t get anymore worse, it went and got worse.

Reflecting back on the book, what gives me most enjoyment is the fact I am still having those “Ah!” moments… the clues and teasers peppered throughout the story from early on are now falling into place when during reading they seemed interesting and kind of relevant but irrelevant at the same time. Sign of good thought process behind writing, I think. (I’m just imagining this big board with newspaper clippings and photos and facts that have pins in them and then string drawn in between them to connect the puzzle together.) Perhaps a weathered and experienced crime/thriller reader would know to keep all kinds of small details in their mind, but I must say I rather enjoy aftereffects!

Overall: 4 stars. I felt there were some things that caused a lot of questions in my mind. A lot of why’s, but’s and why not’s. Then again… knowing the ‘situation’ the questions could be easily put to sleep. Not sure how a more analytical, questioning mind would receive the book, but for me? I was fully blown away by the level of suspense, the twists were balanced ranging from ‘holy shit’ to ‘oh my!” and even though this was a dark and twisted tale, it offered a satisfying ending with a silver lining!